Friday, January 20, 2012

The pressure of a name....(baby boy edition)

So I chatted about baby girl names yesterday here... thank you for all of your sweet comments!
I will share Baby B's name when we know if we have a she or a he! :)

Now, on to the boys, for those of you who don't know...and that is most of husband is a third.
And you wouldn't know this because I rarely share his name or our last name on here. I don't have a fear of stalkers or anything, but who knows who is reading this and what shows up in google searches, so I try to respect anyone I talk about on here. 
I especially do so with The Hubs, reason being I chat about him on here daily and he is in a position where people may or may not do a little research on him and I don't want my blog popping up when someone searches his name.
All of that being said, I will do so for this post and then probably take it down in a few days.

Sooooo, after all that hype....The Hubs' real name is Frank Ferrell Bellar III, "Trey".
He goes by Trey on everything except for is passport, license, and birth certificate.
When I met him I figured his real name wasn't Trey and when we started dating I knew if this was the man I was to marry (which I was already planning in my head...), our son would also be Frank.
Trey was very close to grandfather, aka, "The Original Frank". I, sadly, was unable to meet this amazing man that blessed my husband with so many of the traits I love about him. He is missed, loved, and honored in The Bellar family and I am honored to carry on his name in our son should our little nugget be a boy.

That being what are we going to call our little man?
Yes, he is a little man...a little baby man...not man...I could not see holding my newborn baby saying "oooh, cute little Frank!". 
Trey kept saying we will call him Frankie...but that is my nickname for Trey. I call him that all the time, always have, always would just be too weird. 
Of course there is the option of the middle name...but Ferrell doesn't really flow either. 
So what was I to do?!?! 
I came up with the idea of using Frank but offering a different middle name, this way he would still be honoring Trey's grandfather and father but he wouldn't be a IV. We would use a different family name for the middle name and he would go by that. Trey likes the idea, but I don't know that he is ready to give up the IV. I totally respect that and ultimately this is going to be his decision.
But this also brings up a worry of mine....whilst looking for nicknames for fourth born I came across several momma blogs and postings saying that children who were fourths or higher were typically made fun of...:( What?!??! No?!?!?! My child can not be made fun of...not for something I could have avoided!!
Now, I don't know if they are made fun of because they are fourth (or whatever number they may be) or because of what the original name is, but I don't want to add to any reason for my child to be made fun of! And when is it too much??
I have also come up with a couple other options for "nicknames" for a fourth and narrowed it down to the 2 best for us.
They have meaning to the name and are pretty darn creative...but what choice did I have?! :)
But before I share that with you I am curious to hear what all of you think? 
Do you know anyone in this situation? 
Do you know any 4ths? 
What would you do?
I welcome any and all ideas.....after all I am naming a child that will carry this with them the rest of their lives!! 

So help a sister out! :) 


Jeanna said...

That would be so hard! My husband is a Jr. and his first name is Clifford. He doesn't like his name, so he's not into having a 3rd...but if he were, there are a ton of options for nicknames for a 3rd. Good luck on the 4th! You are so creative and cute that I know y'all will come up with something fabulous! First time commenter, long time reader btw :)

Mary Beth said...

How about the nickname "Fritz"?

The Smiths said...

My husband's oldest brother is a III and he made his son a IV. Their name is Larry. My nephew is 8 yrs. old and I've not heard of him getting made fun of because of his name or because he's a IV.

Jami said...

My husband is also a third. Dwight Wesley. His Dad and Grandfather both went by Dwight and my husband goes by Wes. He said it has been hard having the same name has two other people and he didnt want a 4th. We decided if we ever have a boy we would pick another family name for the first name (and go by that) and have Wesley for the middle name. They way we are still honoring him, his dad and g-dad but not having to call him the same name as someone else :)

Kit said...

This is a toughie. I personally love the idea of keep in the name and making him a IV! I love traditions like that. I have never heard of anyone getting picked on because they were a IV either.

Kristin said...

I had a great guy friend in college who was a "fourth." :) No one made fun of him at all! I think it is super awesome to use the family name if it's a boy!

Anonymous said...

I love your blog!!! very lovely

your newest follower:)

natasha {schue love} said...

We have a long generation of names on my dad's side. But they alternated the first and middle names. Something to consider? I know how strong the family tradition can be...but I also think it's nice to start your own traditions too! :)

Steel Magnolia said...

I have always wondered about this too - naming a baby feels so different than naming an adult man!! But we are adults the majority of our lives so....

I love the tradition of III, IV, etc. I know two "IV's", and they both go by the first name. I also know a "III" and he goes by the middle name. I think it is an extremely masculine thing to do - we women don't have that option!

I have to say I really like the name Frank. "Frank Bellar" has a great ring to it! I think society is getting too far away from traditional names. In fact, if we ever have a son, we are planning on naming him Frederick (grandfather names on both sides!), which is a very old name, but we love the nicknames Fred and Freddie.

A "fourth" nickname could be so cute too. I think you will regret it more if you don't use the name. I think anyone who understands the tradition behind passing down a name would never make fun of it.

Good luck - whatever you choose will be perfect for your little man!